What This Year Taught Me

"Because faith isn't proven like gold 'Til it's been through the fire."

This year stretched me in ways I didn’t expect, or truthfully, wasn't sure I wanted.  It was a year of uncertainty, waiting, and learning how little control I actually have. What I thought would be a season of fixing and figuring out became a season of standing.

One unexpected teacher this year was walking alongside Dennis through a season of deep anxiety. (He knows I'm writing this.) He couldn’t work for six months. I think I experienced every emotion--sadness, frustration, resentment, fear, joy, peace, uncertainty, yet trust, dread, and loneliness. This year felt like being on a complete roller coaster.  

It opened my eyes to realities I had never fully understood—how fear can live in the body, how little logic helps in the moment, and how presence matters more than solutions. It stretched my compassion, exposed my "fixer" tendency, and taught me that love often looks like just standing when I didn't have any answers.

Here’s what I learned most:

I learned that strength doesn’t always look like forward motion. Sometimes it looks like standing still, trusting, when everything in me wanted to rush ahead.

I learned that trying to control outcomes only increases anxiety, but releasing them creates space for peace, creativity, and compassion. (You know that I’ve had control issues. You’d think I’d have cured this by now.)

And I learned that growth often comes not by avoiding uncomfortable feelings, but by gently moving toward them—curious and honest with myself and God. When I moved toward Dennis in his anxious times is when he said his healing began.

This year reminded me that faith isn’t certainty. It’s choosing to trust when I don’t have any answers—and discovering that God is already at work, even if I can’t see it yet. If I know the answer, it’s doesn’t need faith, does it?

AND the big lesson-- what looks like delay or a detour often turns out to be care, protection, or preparation—forming me into who He needs me to be for what’s ahead.

As I step into what’s next, I’m carrying less hurry, more humility, and a deeper confidence that standing with God is never wasted. He does make the rough places smooth. (Is. 42:16—one of my life verses.)

I hope you have a blessed Christmas!

Gratefully typed,

Jan

Jan McDonald
Maxwell Leadership Certified Team


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