Schedule a Call

Your Path to Breakthroughs: Insights from Jan McDonald

From hopeless drunk to 30 years sober and helping hundreds of individuals and organizations unlock their ‘and then some’, I distill all the lessons gained from those transformational life experiences and share them with you in this space.

I invite you to explore these insights as way to help you breakthrough the challenges that are stopping you from becoming who you want to be.

Categories

Download the FREE Guide

5 Simple Steps to Maximize Your Effectiveness

Download Guide

Anxiety Whispering

"Calmness is power. Say to your heart, "Peace be still."

--James Allen

What I’m going to share with you made no sense to me when I first heard it. When I used it in the height of rush hour traffic when I wasn’t sure of my destination–it worked! I was so amazed.

So I taught it in my workshop, “Building Inner Strength for Resilient Advocates.” It was one of their favorite tools to combat anxiety.

I don’t know about you, but when I get anxious, I fight it. I want it to go away at that moment! My hubby, Dennis, has been reading a book called “Beyond Anxiety,” by Martha Beck, because he has been diagnosed with anxiety.  (I have his approval to tell you this.) Martha says that rather than fight the uncomfortable anxious feelings, we embrace them. We embrace them like we would hug a scared puppy.  How would we calm a scared puppy? 

We would hold them close, but not too tightly, and we would pet them with loving strokes. “It’s okay that you’re scared. It’s okay, you’re safe here. There’s no danger, ” would be some of the things that we would say to them. 

We wouldn’t tell them it’s stupid to be afraid or to get over it, like I sometimes tell myself. That soothing puppy concept sounded so counterintuitive to me…until I tried it. And when the participants in my workshop tried it on something that was causing them anxiety, it worked. I could watch their shoulders drop and sense their calmness. At the end of the workshop, hands down, that was one of their big takeaways!

How does this work? When you are feeling anxious or fearful:

•    Acknowledge the fear. 
•    Ask yourself what is causing the fear; get curious. When we ask ourselves a question the logical side of the brain starts to work—that shuts down the emotional side. Yay! 
•    Sigh. Every time we breath out, the heartbeat slows a little and that is calming.
•    Shift your state to calm by speaking calming words (see below.)
•    Be gentle on yourself. Give yourself compassion like you would a scared kitty or puppy. 

Here are some calming statements: 
“Hello, anxiety. I see you.”
“You’re trying to keep me safe. Thank you.”
“But I’m not in danger right now.”
“I’m okay in this moment. I am safe.”
“I can handle this, one breath at a time.”

Yeah, I know, it sounds weird. Try it. Bring to mind a situation that causes you anxiety.  It could be something from work, a difficult conversation, driving in rush hour traffic, or even feeling overwhelmed. Breathe slowly, whisper quietly, and comfort yourself like you would a friend…or a scared puppy.  Let me know how it works for you.

Calmly typed, 

Jan

Jan McDonald
Maxwell Leadership Certified Team

For a friend to subscribe, here is the link:
https://jan-mcdonald-llc.mykajabi.com/opt-in

Continue Reading...

Tips to Defuse Negative Emotions🤪

"Emotions are neither good nor bad, it's our thinking that makes them so."

--my humble opinion

The Latin derivative for the word emotion, “emotere,’ literally means energy in motion. Emotions are just energy moving through the body. They are not good or bad; it’s the meaning that we attach to them.

Emotions are the bodies reaction to your mind. For example, if you FEEL threatened, physically or psychologically that causes the body to contract—what we call fear. Strong emotions bring changes chemically in the body

The First Law of Thermodynamics (Conservation) states that energy is always conserved, it cannot be created or destroyed. In essence, energy can be converted from one form into another. What happens to emotions when they are not expressed?  When anxiety, fear, resentment, sadness or any emotion that cause us to dislike ourselves and/or others are stuffed instead of processed, they have to go somewhere.  Neuroscientists have come to the conclusion that stuffing results in a build up of energy in the body can manifest as stress. This can affect blood pressure, memory and self-esteem. Longer term, or chronic stress, can cause increased risk of diabetes, heart disease, depression, headaches, or anxiety disorders.
  
An emotion usually represents an amplified and energized thought pattern. If we allow the negative emotion to take us over, rather than identifying it and letting it pass, it often starts a vicious cycle—the thinking and the emotion feed each other. By dwelling mentally on the situation, event or person that is the perceived cause of the emotion, the thought feeds energy to the emotion which in turn energizes that thought pattern and so on. It can turn into a vicious cycle.

How do we defuse negative emotions?  I’m not a psychologist, and I’m not talking about the grief experienced from loss. but this is how I handle negative emotions:

1. Eat chocolate. I’m sure there’s a chemical in chocolate that makes you feel better.  Just kidding. The real #1 is to step back and identify it. Get curious. What is the emotion?  What is causing the emotion?   When I take  the time to name the emotion, it usually isn’t anger at all, but fear, rejection, disappointment, frustration, self-judgement, etc. Take the time to ask yourself enough questions to name it.  Naming it removes some of its power. 

2. Tequila shots and Moosehead beer. NOT! That’s the old me. The real second step is to FEEL the emotion. The goal is to feel it; not make it go away.  I know that sounds crazy, but  Dr. Leaf says, “Feeling is healing.”  Be your own best friend. If you were down, your best friend wouldn’t tell you to “just get over it.” They would validate your feeling and empathize with you.  Give yourself that same compassion for the situation you are in. (Remember, what we resists, persists and even grows.)

3. Blame someone else. That’s my fave. The real #3 is nobody or no thing makes me feel an emotion. The emotions are my own making. I even hate to write that. Think about it. My husband likes to finger tap, on the steering wheel, on the back of my chair, on the coffee table with his foot…he just taps. It is so irritating to me. BUT, someone else might not even notice it.  Flying causes extreme anxiety in many people. I don’t understand that. What drives you crazy may have zero impact on me. 

4. Deny it. Yeah, that’s like me telling you to not think about the pink elephant in the room . You’re thinking about that now, aren’t you? The real #4 is to accept it. Embrace the negative feeling and discover the message that it has for you.  Ask yourself, “What does this mean?” and “What must I do with it?” Are you able to take action on whatever it is that is impacting you?  I have found that most things that get under my skin are those things that I can’t control. So I just have to feel the pain, and let go.  

I feel better just writing this. Especially, because much of what is bothering me today is out of my control. What I can control is my response and how I live in my own world.

Naming those pesky emotions, 

Jan

Jan McDonald
Maxwell Leadership Certified Team

For a friend to subscribe, here is the link:
https://jan-mcdonald-llc.mykajabi.com/opt-in

Continue Reading...

Warning: Are You Finishing Well?

"No one has a problem with the first mile of a journey. Even an infant could do fine for a while. But it isn't the start that matters. It's the finish line."

--Julien Smith

What? It’s June already?  What happened to the whole first half of the year. This thought prompted me to look more closely at my goals. Some goals are right on; some could use some extra work. 

There is a teaching in the Maxwell Bible in 2 Chronicles.  John’s commentary is titled “Leaders Need to Finish Well.”  Four of the kings written about in Chronicles started their reigns really well. Their people benefited from their success and fame, but the kings let their good times go to their heads and their monarchy finishes were not so pretty.

Here are some reasons for their poor finishes:

1. The people drifted away from their calling as spiritual leaders and their jobs became routine and ho-hum rather than executed with their original passion.

2. The kings overestimated their own personal importance and allowed themselves to become exceptions to the rules. 

3. The kings grew blind to their weaknesses and refused accountability. 

4. The kings did not raise up, train and empower great leaders to follow in their original values and passion. If we are to leave any lasting legacy, a successful passing of the leadership torch needs to be in place.  They didn’t create a strategy to have the right people in the right place at the right time. 

I remember writing my book,  “Fruitful Leadership; Leading by The Fruit of The Spirit.” When I began the study, which became the book, of the Fruit of the Spirit and daily posted  my thoughts on the private Facebook page–I felt called to do it. I was very excited about it! I wrote when I didn’t feel like it because I felt such a passion for what I was learning. Really…what better leadership characteristics to model than those of the Spirit. Those traits are love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness and self-control.
 

I do the very best I know how, the very best I can,
and I mean to keep on doing so until the end.
Abraham Lincoln

Then came the editing part–boring. But I didn’t want to drift away from my original calling and passion to turn out something less than my best.  I wanted finishing the book as a writing of worth, beauty, elegance and, hopefully, impact.  Thinking about it this way gave me new resolve and excitement, which pulled me through the editing. My editor held me accountable and kept me humble. Geesh, I paid her to tell me where my writing wasn’t done well! 

I published the book in 2019. It’s not a best seller, but I got a text last weekend from a reader who is still turning to it for devotionals. Pushing through the editing was worth it to have the impact that I believed the book could have.

We’re halfway through 2025. Have you revisited your goals lately? Hopefully, most of you look at them daily. 

How’s your passion?  Do you know what your blind spots are?  Do you feel like your life has become ho-hum?  Are your drifting from your calling?  Are you raising up other leaders to continue your legacy?  Let me help you if  you need it,  so you can finish 2025 well!

Finishing 2025 well,

Jan McDonald
Maxwell Leadership Certified Team 

For more leadership or growth hacks, follow me on Facebook @janmariemcdonald


For a friend to subscribe, here is the link
https://jan-mcdonald-llc.mykajabi.com/opt-in

Continue Reading...

Soar Like Pelicans!

"Wave slope surfing has taught me to soar in the midst of trying circumstances."

--Jan McDonald

Dennis has been challenged with a health issue and hasn’t worked since Thanksgiving. The docs (and there were many of them) have done every test and haven’t found anything wrong. At first, we thought it was the small mass that they found on his kidney because of all the symptoms. The small mass was removed  at the end of March and thankfully it was benign. However, some of the symptoms remain.

Our first response to this trial was, “when is this going to be over?”

Isn’t that how we face most of our circumstances? “I want this to be over how can I fix this maybe this will work or that will work what can I control?” 

The Good Book says, “Consider it all joy when you face trials of many kinds, because the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” SHUT UP. Thank you very much—I don’t need any more endurance. 

Watching my loved one suffer has been the hardest, especially because there hasn’t been anything I could do to fix the situation. I’ve had to stay positive, because I needed my creativity and good attitude not only for Dennis but for those I serve in coaching and training. 

This brought to mind something I learned from pelicans at the Oregon Coast. (You can barely see the pelicans in the picture.)  Wave slope surfing is a technique that pelicans use where they glide just inches above the ocean surface, using the slight air pressure created by the forward slope of a wave. By positioning themselves at just the right angle and height, they ride the wave’s energy with minimal effort—soaring for miles with barely a flap. It has taught me to see the “waves’’ in my life with a different perspective. 

How does this apply to our lives? 

1.    Pelicans don’t fight the waves; they use the momentum to carry them forward. Instead of resisting or trying to control that which we can’t, we can learn to ride the energy of the situation. We can use the “wind” to grow and change rather than to wallow in self-pity.  

2.    Pelicans fly close to the water—just inches above the danger–where the lift is strongest. The bigger the wave the faster they go! Leaning into our challenges often gives us the greatest insight and growth. I’ve been learning to move toward the emotions that I’m feeling rather than running from them. Those of you who know me, know that this has been a struggle for me. 

3.    The powerlessness feeling has been so brutal. Pelicans don’t struggle with powerlessness; they go with the flow. They don’t work harder to try and fix their situation, they just soar. 

4.    When pelicans crash, they regroup. Pelicans don’t stop flying because they fell once. Similarly, our strength grows each time we get up after falling. Resilience isn’t about never crashing—it’s about remembering that we can fly again. 

As Dennis and I search for more solutions—I know we’ll find one. But when the next wave comes—and it will—I will remember; I was never meant to outrun it or resist it. I was meant to use its energy to soar above it. Even if I crash, I am not defeated; I’m getting ready to fly again.

What wave are you facing that could become an updraft if you changed your perspective? 

Need some help? I’m an email away. 

Learning from pelicans,

Jan

Jan McDonald
Maxwell Leadership Certified Team

For a friend to subscribe: https://jan-mcdonald-llc.mykajabi.com/opt-in

Continue Reading...

The Terror Barrier–3 Steps to Crush It!

If you want something in life that you've never had, you're going to have to do something you've never done."

--JD Houston

How many times have you been asked to do something you’ve never done before? I know that stepping out of our comfort zone can be…well…terrifying. Okay, maybe not that bad, but the places that we go in our heads can be. We often wonder, “What if I don’t do well?” “What if I fail?” “What if I really can’t do it?” “What if I look stupid?” And “geesh, maybe you should have thought about this more and who are you to do this I mean there’s no way you’ll succeed…blah, blah, blah.”

I have learned to change my thinking to, “What if I nail it?” “What if it’s an epic success?” “What if I’m the exact person for that task?”

Well, here’s a different way to think about it. “What ifs” are not truth. Negative “what ifs” are just statements that our brain makes up to keep us in our comfort zone. “What ifs” are thoughts to keep us from getting hurt. We bump up against limitations that we have created in our minds.

Those self-created limitations are called the Terror Barrier. The Terror Barrier lurks just outside the comfort zone waiting to pounce. It’s that feeling of dread or the certainty that we are doomed if we try the thing we want to attempt. It’s that feeling a man gets when he wants to ask a woman out on a date. It’s that feeling that we get when the boss calls us into his/her office. It’s that feeling most people get when they are asked to speak publicly. It’s that feeling we get whenever we want to try something risky or new.

Here’s 3 steps to becoming a wrecking ball on your personal Terror Barrier:

1. Do it afraid. Just keep moving forward no matter how badly your feet want to stay rooted to the ground. Refuse to let this limitation (that probably was your own creation) to control you or your future.

2. Expect the enemy. The Terror Barrier rears its ugly head every time we want to step into territory where we haven’t previously traveled. It’s natural and normal. Simply shrug and tell yourself, “Oh, there you are again. You’re trying to keep me safe. This must mean something great for me if you are trying to stop me.”

3. Keep your eyes on the prize. Mentally see yourself winning. Eleanor Roosevelt said, “You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing you think you cannot do.” Focus on how good it will feel to break through–victory tastes sooooo sweet.

I think we have no idea what we are truly capable of. Today, when you are faced with the Terror Barrier, take the above 3 steps. You can do it. Smashing through that barrier is possible and remember, once you stretch that comfort zone, it never goes back to the original smaller shape.

Go and grow…BIGTIME!

Jan

Jan McDonald
Maxwell Leadership Certified Team
For a friend to subscribe: https://jan-mcdonald-llc.mykajabi.com/opt-in

Continue Reading...

Self-Integrity

"Honor your commitments with integrity.”

--Les Brown

In The 17 Indisputable Laws of Teamwork, John Maxwell writes about the Law of Countability.  This law is all about being able to count on each other. One of the things that I love about teaching a subject is that I have to learn it well myself. Read on for the fascinating concept that this brought to me.

If we’re not sure if we can count on each other, it could distract us, slow us down, or shut us down completely.  If we can’t count on each other, trust is lost. A few characteristics of teams that don’t trust each other are; They don’t ask for help, they hide their weaknesses, spend inordinate amounts of time managing behaviors or walking on egg shells, and/or jump to conclusions about others intentions.

There are five keys to create trust so we can count on each other.

1. Character–that’s who we are when nobody else is looking. We bring our integrity to our team. Character is an inside job.
2. Competence–we know our jobs well and contribute our strengths to the team.
3.  Commitment–we are committed to our team no matter what. We do what we say we will do.
4. Consistency–we don’t allow for gaps in our performance. Team members know what to expect from us.
5. Cohesion–we are team players; we get along with members of the team.

Let’s go back to character which is the foundation of effective leadership…and self-leadership. I don’t have a problem showing integrity to others. When I commit to doing something for someone else, it gets done.

Here’s the fascinating concept: There are times when I don’t keep commitments to me.  For example, I told myself I was going to start posting consistently on social media. I did…for about 3 days.  Oh geesh, I couldn’t count on me! If I do not honor the word to myself, then I don’t believe myself. I don’t trust myself. Lack of trust in myself can hold me back AND if I continue to break those commitments to me, I can set up a pattern where it’s okay to not keep my word to myself.

What an awareness! I need improvement here. I may not get it right all the time, but I can change. I know the power of teaching my mind and body self-mastery is immense. I want myself to realize that if I commit personally to something, no matter what, I am going to do it.

When I asked the team that I was teaching what was their biggest “take-away” from that day, many of them said it was the concept of self-integrity. They had never thought of it that way.

Neither had I.

Continually learning,

Jan

Continue Reading...

Enjoy Guilt Free Status

"Watch what you tell yourself, you're likely to believe it."

Technology can bring out the worst in me. On Friday morning, I had a couple of challenges that highjacked my positive attitude. The Head Trash began. “This shouldn’t be this hard, you’re just old.” “These instructions are so simple, you aren’t smart enough.” “You’re not good enough.”

I shouldn’t have been surprised, as I am often tested in the areas in which I teach or coach. I just had a conversation with a coaching client on guilt and self-talk earlier in the week. I didn’t remember that because my body was in fight mode and I wasn’t thinking clearly. 

After a half day of bad attitude and snarky comments in my head, I dropped everything and headed out to do yard work in the sun. 

As I clipped back the dead lavender and threw the clippings in the garbage can, I realized that was what I needed to do with my Head Trash. Clip it off and throw it in the garbage. It occurred to me then that I had just shared that concept a couple of days before. The light in my head went on and I sat there in the sun and started to laugh. 

That Head Trash circling in my head is not true about me. That is not who I am. (NO, 72 is not old. It’s the new 49.) I am smart, I am good enough. In fact, I am complete in Jesus, not lacking anything. God sees me as perfect (Ephesians 1:4,5) and I need to agree with His vision. WOW! That changes everything. 

I don’t need anything outside of myself to make me feel better. I have emotions; I don’t let them have me. (okay, not very often.) I get to choose my thoughts and attitude. I’m grateful that those times where I let those nasty voices in my head get the better of me are fewer and farther in between. 

There remains no accusing voice…we do it to ourselves…or is it just me? 

Oh yeah, when I went back to the technology challenges with a fresh perspective and positive mindset, I figured them out…quickly. 

Still learning, 

Jan


Jan McDonald
Maxwell Leadership Certified Team

Continue Reading...

Our Minds Are Like Gardens

“Your thinking, more than anything else, shapes the way you live. It’s really true that if you change your thinking, you can change your life.”

--John Maxwell

In my former home, I spent many a Saturday sitting on my stone path pulling weeds and grass from among the Steppables, ground covers that you can walk on. I really didn’t mind doing this because gardening, including weed pulling is like Valium to me. It’s calming, gives me time to think and Truffle used to love it, too. 


While out there, I often thought of how much the stone path reminded me of my mind. No, not that I have rocks in my head, which maybe true sometimes, but what I sow in my mind is often what I reap in real life.


“How the mind is fed, shapes the life that’s led,” Christian Simpson (a former coaching mentor.)

Like the stone path, or any garden for that matter, it can be gorgeously cultivated or shamefully neglected. What we plant, grows. Just as I used to intentionally cultivate my stone path to keep it free from weeds, allowing the ornamentals to flower and flourish, I need to tend the garden of my mind.

If I don’t plant seeds of truth, growth, and possibility, an abundance of weed-like seeds of lack, limitation and mediocrity will take hold and continue to produce after their kind.

I can allow my current circumstances to permeate my mind garden and believe that “that’s just the way I am” or “that’s just the way it’s going to be,” or I can plant seeds of expectation of good things to come. I can sow seeds that will ultimately change my life.

I need to remember that my current circumstances do not define me. My current circumstances are the product of what I have been planting in these last years. The very cool part of all this is that I can weed my mind. I am lord over my thoughts and I can change them. And when I change what seeds go in, I change what I become without. Yippee!

To the right is a picture of the stone path. It was so beautiful, but it took constant vigilance to maintain that beauty. (The new owner took the plants out and rocked the whole path:(

So it is with our minds–it takes constant watchfulness and care.

What are you planting? What thoughts are you nourishing? How are you cultivating the rich, fertile soil of your best asset, your mind?

This is something for me to think about, as well, as I head out to plant the empty flower pots in my current home.

If you’re stuck struggling with old thoughts, I’m happy to coach you out of that struggle!

Thinking great thoughts,

Jan McDonald

Continue Reading...

What Is Rule #6? How We Think Impacts Everything!

"Nothing is either good or bad, but thinking makes it so."

--Shakespeare

I pulled out a book by Wayne Dyer, “The Power Of Intention,” because I’m going over my 2025 goals.  I’ve also been writing about anxiety and leadership, so I don’t think it’s any coincidence that I “stumbled” on this chapter about living a stress-free life. AND it’s not a coincidence because I am living with a lot of unknowns these days. You know how unknowns used to paralyze me with fear. 

Wayne Dyer says that we were created to live fully alive and on purpose in a state of peace and joy. I happen to agree with him. Many of you know that I believe in God and He isn’t anything like I used to believe. Until I got to know Him, I thought he was this big guy who lived in heaven and really needed some anger management classes. He is nothing like that at all. If you don’t believe in God, just ignore this part, but He sent Jesus so that we could live life abundantly.  We can have abundant joy, peace, blessings and happiness. 

God is love, so everything that He does with us stems out of His love for us. He wants us to love Him back out of our own volition. We are not robots, He has given us choice.  He has given us the power to choose our thoughts.  That is why I thought this chapter was so powerful.  Whether you believe in God or not, you have the power to choose your thoughts.

Back to Wayne Dyer’s book.  In this chapter, he writes, “There’s no actual stress or anxiety in the world, it’s your thoughts that create these false beliefs. There are only people engaged in stressful thinking.” Read that sentence again and ponder it. 

You may be wondering about all the bad that is transpiring in the world, like murder, rape, abuse and the like.  What about that?  I don’t want to negate the awfulness of some things that have happened or can happen to us. BUT, let’s talk about our everyday normal life. 
 

Think about the things that make you anxious. Stop
and think about them. 


I’ll give you a personal example. Up until recently, when I had a workshop or speaking engagement in my calendar, I couldn’t sleep well for a couple nights prior.  It didn’t matter how much I prepared or how well I thought the presentation was written, sleep eluded me. What the heck? What was this all about?  This is my life–I don’t want to be a sleepless zombie.

I reflected on it and came to the insight that it was about ego. I wanted to look good. I was afraid of failing. What if I do something stupid?  What if they don’t have fun? What if they don’t think the time spent with me was  worth it? What if…what if…okay, what if? If I have done my best, I have no control over their response. Although, I really like to think I do:)  If I do something stupid, I can laugh with them. It won’t be the first time. I found that my thinking was all about me. And THAT is hilarious, because I am not presenting for me, I am there to serve them and to add value to THEIR life. Geesh. 

Our natural state is tranquility and peace, but when we try to control those things that we have no control over, or think stressful thoughts, that’s what causes the anxiety.  The cure? Consider Rule #6. 

“Two prime ministers are sitting in a room discussing affairs of state. Suddenly a man bursts in, apoplectic with fury, shouting and stamping and banging his fist on the desk. The resident prime minister admonishes him: “Peter,” he says, “kindly remember Rule Number 6,” whereupon Peter is instantly restored to complete calm, apologizes, and withdraws. The politicians return to their conversation, only to be interrupted yet again twenty minutes later by a hysterical woman gesticulating wildly, her hair flying. Again the intruder is greeted with the words: “Marie, please remember Rule Number 6.” Complete calm descends once more, and she too withdraws with a bow and an apology. When the scene is repeated for the third time, the visiting prime minister addresses his colleague: “My dear friend, I’ve seen many things in my life, but never anything as remarkable as this. Would you be willing to share with me the secret of Rule Number 6?”

“Very simple,” replies the resident prime minister. “Rule Number 6 is ‘Don’t take yourself so g—dang seriously.”

“Ah,” says his visitor, “that is a fine rule.”

After a moment of pondering, he inquires, “And what, may I ask, are the other rules?”

“There aren’t any.”  (This is from a book called “The Art of Possibility, ” by The Zanders)

When you feel anxious or stressed this week, consider your thoughts.  How are you thinking about the issue that is stressing you?  Is it in your control?  Is there a different way you can look at it? 

Constantly changing my thinking,

Jan

Continue Reading...

Got Persistence?

“Press on: nothing in the world can take the place of perseverance. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent."

-- Calvin Coolidge

My hubby and I have been living through a health challenge since Thanksgiving. I’m not going to bore you with the details, but it’s been a grind. We have persisted and are finally getting answers and seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. 

I’ve been reminded of mile 10 in the Big Sur marathon. It’s a 5% grade uphill to Hurricane point. Having driven the course the night before, I knew that hill was more than a mile long.  It looks really steep at the bottom, believe me. I took a deep breath, focused on the road directly in front of me and just ground it out to the top. That success gave me the impetus to finish strong. I knew if I could run up that–I could run anything.

Sometimes leadership and life feels like that, doesn’t it?  Whether you’re the CEO of a large corporation or non-profit or the parent of a family, sometimes we just have to put our head down and face what’s directly in front of us…one step at a time…until we reach our goal. 

Persistence is a driving trait of a strong leader.  It is the ability to continue to move forward toward our goals in spite of tremendous obstacles or set backs. Persistence helps us confront complications and yet still keep our perspective.

 When we face obstacles, challenges or even failure, persistence is the ability to face them with the determination and tenacity to find a solution. As leaders, we are the ones who set the tone for those we lead.  Isn’t this the behavior that we want to see in those we lead?  If we are raising up other leaders, we want them to learn to persist until they solve the problem.  Our persistence establishes a set of expectations for our teams.  They learn to expect to solve problems on their own and they develop a “can do” attitude because of that expectation.

We are programmed to give up or take the easier route. But grinding out the best solution builds character and helps grow into our full potential.  Persevering develops our talent and self-esteem for the next challenge that we face. It makes us stronger, hence it makes those we lead stronger.

Life may be easy…but that’s only if we are living inside of our comfort zone. Who wants to stay there? It’s not very fun or exciting. Leaders live on the edge. Leaders push the envelope …most of the time. Yes, there are times, when I want the couch and my blankie–but those times don’t last long anymore. Practicing persistence can become a habit, because of the positive effects it has on us and other in our lives.

Persistence gives us the ability to remain consistent even in the face of challenges and difficulties. Consistency provides stability to those who follow because they know what they can expect from the leader and they know what is expected from them.

The last thought on persistence; Those who develop the habit of persistence  seem to enjoy insurance against failure.  No matter how many times we may be defeated, persistence enables us to get up and give it another go.  No matter how smart, educated or talented we are, a goal or vision of any great stature will not be achieved without persistence. Nothing takes the place of persistence.

Have you developed the habit of persistence? Are you modeling that for those you lead?

Persisting,

Jan

Continue Reading...

Imagination Is So Important!

“The imagination is literally the workshop wherein are fashioned all plans created by man.”

--Napolean Hill

Imagination is what allows us to create a life we wish we had.  By exercising that magnificent mental muscle, we can change our life’s outcome through our creative imagination by taking a moment and really imagining what it is we want – with clear details and practicing this everyday until what was once an idea becomes our reality. 

Without imagination we wouldn’t have all of the things around us.  Take the light bulb; Thomas Edison worked diligently on perfecting a commercially manufactured light bulb.  He imagined that it was possible and eventually achieved success.  He has been quoted as saying “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”  What if he had not used his imagination and believed in the possibility? 

When my coaching clients learn and practice this, they have amazing breakthroughs!

Napolean Hill devotes a whole chapter to imagination in his book, “Think and Grow Rich.”  While we can imagine all sorts of fabulous dreams and scenes in our minds, I think we forget that we can use our imagination in a negative way–when we worry.  Worry is when we focus on a future negative. We often focus on and imagine those particular negative scenarios taking place in our lives.

And the funny thing is, those events, circumstances, and conditions haven’t even transpired yet, and we don’t even know if they ever will.  Ninety percent of the things we worry about never happen anyway.  But we so often worry ourselves sick (quite literally), imagining all the possible negative scenarios that could play out.

What are you worried about today? If you stop for a moment and reflect on what it is you’re thinking about. Are you focused on what you want in your life, or are you focused on the exact opposite; on what you don’t want to happen? 

As Napoleon Hill said, and I truly believe, “your only limitation in life is in the development and use of your imagination.” Why not develop your imagination and focus on what you truly desire in your life–because what we focus on grows and multiplies. 

Imagining a warm, sandy beach in 2025,

Continue Reading...

Margin? What the Heck is That?

The best things in life are written in the margins.”

--Christa Sterken

In today’s world, margin is more essential than ever because of the blistering pace of life, constant demands, and relentless noise that drain our time, energy, and focus. We book every minute of every day and try to maximize productivity. Unfortunately, booking every minute only makes you busy, not productive. And on top of that, it’s just not sustainable. It might seem like a good idea, but it doesn’t allow you to give your best.  Since energy is a finite resource, if we don’t manage our margin as a priority, we get decision fatigue, we may be impatient with others, downloading negative energy onto others. 
 

What is margin? The magical space between “I’ve got this” and “I’m about to lose my mind.” It’s the breathing time in your life that gives us time to recharge and renew. 
 

Margin improves your emotional intelligence, gives you needed think time and renews your energy. John Maxwell says to leave 20% of your calendar for free time.  That seems like a lot. When we discover the benefits of leaving breathing room in our lives, we just might change our minds…I did. 

Here are a few benefits and this is the short list: 

1.  Mentally–reduces stress, burnout and overwhelm and increases clarity and focus.
2.  Relationally–reduces reactive communication and fosters thoughtful responses
3. Physically–reduces the impact of chronic stress on the body
4.  Margin increase productivity and creativity
5.  Enhances overall life satisfaction by focusing on what truly matters

How ARE you feeling these days? 

Here are a few really easy things that are restorative for our lives:

  • Get outside and be grateful for the beauty.
  • Instead of running from one task to the next, take a minute and breathe deeply. Drop your shoulders and relax. 
  • Eliminate hurry (oh, that feels sooooo good.)
  • Learn to say “no.”
  • Eat healthy, exercise and get enough sleep. (yes, make time for that.)

In essence, margin is not about doing less; it’s about creating space for what’s most important–YOU!  It enables you to lead with intentionality, connection, and impact rather than constantly reacting to life’s demands.

Where do you feel you need more margin in your life right now?

Need some help prioritizing what you value to create margin?  I’m an email away!

You’re welcome, 

Jan

Continue Reading...

Laughter, The Best Medicine

A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.”

--Phyllis Diller

How important is humor?  Don’t ask a humor researcher because they are already fighting an uphill battle to get the respect they deserve.

Seriously, with all the interesting stuff going on in our lives–I spent some time this week whining.  I was reminded that the apostle Paul wrote Philippians, the “Joy” chapter in the Bible, when he was in prison.”  That made me laugh…and I realized that I had let circumstances control my attitude.

Yep, prison in Bible times was horrendous. Many times the prisoners were chained to the wall, or worse yet, a guard. There were rats, diseases and no central air or heat. I am assuming they didn’t get a nice warm bath in a garden tub everyday, either. If you read through that book, Paul writes about joy and rejoicing numerous times.

We all know it is much easier to love an funny, happy person than it is to love a sad, grumpy, miserable person. Happiness, laughter, humor and joy just make a relationship easier.  When we are down, we want someone positive in our lives to lift us up out of our rut, and maybe even make us laugh.

Laughter is the best medicine. Laughing not only improves our mental state, it has been proven to benefit our circulation, lungs and muscles. Laughter boosts the immune system, protects the heart and burns calories. It triggers the release of endorphins, which are the bodies “feel-good” chemicals. Did you know that laugher is one of the first things a newborn exhibits?  (I found that on the internet–it has to be true.)

Speaking of funny…in 2017, the other year of eternal snow, I went home at noon from work to get lunch. I had on a dress, tights, boots and my black, hooded, faux fur coat.  I couldn’t get my car up the driveway because it had snowed that morning. I grabbed a shovel so I could clean a path to drive my car up into the garage to keep it warm.  I didn’t realize that under that snow, was a sheet of ice. The next thing I knew, I was flat on my back, dress and coat over my head, the shovel flying to the end of the driveway! (Go ahead, take some time and picture that in your head.) I was mortified! As I struggled to get up…very quickly…I started to laugh so hard, that I slipped again.

I don’t recall if anyone saw me. I am sure that fiasco would have been a winner on Funniest Home videos. I never did get the car up the drive either. But if that didn’t make you laugh, here are some quotes that may:

“I am thankful for laughter, except when the milk comes out of my nose.”  Woody Allen

“Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.” Jim Carrey

“If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for in the morning, sleep late.” Henny Youngman

“I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.”  Mae West

“If you can’t remember my name, just say “Chocolate” and I’ll turn around.”  I don’t know who said that.

“When I try on an outfit and it doesn’t make me look good, I just throw it on the floor. Like, no, you don’t deserve to be hung up. Sit there alone and think about what you’ve done.”  Nobody would take credit for this one, either.

“People need to understand the difference between wants and needs. Like I want abs, and I need tacos.” Unanimous. Or is it anonymous. Whatever.

“Today, I will be as useless as the “G” in lasagna.”  That’s a good one for a Monday.

I had a blast looking for funny quotes that I could actually share in this email.  They made me laugh and I hope I brought a smile to your Monday. Inject some humor into your life today. Don’t take things so seriously. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Smile. Laugh. Enjoy life, because you never get out of it alive. 

Laughing.

Jan

Continue Reading...

The Great Detachment

"Employees could be struggling...that's a leadership issue...we have the solution."

--Perry Holley

This morning, I listened to a Maxwell Leadership podcast about “The Great Detachment,” which provided eye-opening insights into the challenges many organizations are facing. Over the past three years, companies have undergone massive and rapid changes. Economic pressures have led to tighter budgets and increased workloads for employees. In hybrid work environments, ineffective communication often exacerbates these issues, resulting in detachment, decreased productivity, and heightened anxiety. These factors are key drivers behind “The Great Detachment” and the growing prevalence of workplace anxiety.

In November, I facilitated a workshop for a government entity on Managing Workplace Anxiety. With today’s fast-paced, ever-evolving job market, employees often grapple with fears of job insecurity, keeping up with new technologies and processes, or adapting to management changes. These challenges can severely impact productivity, well-being and engagement, as well. 

A significant contributor to both workplace anxiety and employee detachment is the lack of clear, defined expectations. When employees don’t know what’s expected of them, it creates uncertainty, undermining confidence and connection to their roles.

I would like to offer one solution from my workshop to the uncertainty of expections which can cause anxiety and detachment: 

When we train a new employee, make sure that their job description is well defined and you have gone through it thoroughly with that new employee. Here are five steps to provide them with clearcut expectations:

1. You learn the task with your standards of excellence and they watch you do it. I know this sounds simple, but as a CEO, a lot of my daily work was in my head. Until I wrote my job description in detail, I didn’t remember all the steps needed to get my job done. Therefore, I couldn’t teach it thoroughly. 

2. You both do the task or job together. When you do this with them, you show them exactly what you expect and the results that you want.

3. Then you allow them to do the job and you watch. Provide feedback during this time so they know ALL of your expectations. Answer all the questions they may have. By this time, your new hire should demonstrate competence to proceed to the next step. 

4. You set them free to do the job on their own, checking back for your employee’s performance.  Periodically, check their progress to make sure they are meeting your standards. Continually provide support where they may need it to reinforce expectations and future success.

While these steps are time-consuming, my experience has shown that clear expectations promote greater engagement, productivity and significantly reduce anxiety. Even better, I’ve often found that employees return with innovative, more streamlined ways of doing things—ideas I might never have considered on my own!

Please email me if you have any questions!

Jan

Continue Reading...

January 10, 2025 is National Quitters Day

“A New Year, a New You is possible. Decide who you want to be and go after that. "

--Jan McDonald

January 10th is National Quitter’s Day; the day that most people abandon their New Year’s Resolutions. 

Wow. We don’t often keep our resolutions. Why is that?  In my humble opinion there are two reasons:

1. We don’t change our mindset around the goal we are seeking. If we don’t think differently about the behavior, we will continue behaving the same way. It’s habitual and that’s the way your mind likes it. Your mind hates change because change is hard. Habit is easy…okay, unless we’re trying to create new ones:)

2. We don’t have someone to whom we can be accountable. That reason comes from the people I coach. AND I’ve experienced that. I have to remind myself often regarding the actions that I committed to that will get me closer to who I want to be. I know that my coach is going to keep me accountable for my results. 

I’m sure there’s more reasons why we don’t keep our resolutions.

Close your eyes and imagine for a moment what it would look like with your goal achieved. How would you feel? What would you look like? What would you be able to think about without the constant mental struggle regarding your goal? What does your perfect health look and feel like? Who would you become?  Oh…wouldn’t it be great? 

Before I give you a solution that I have for these reasons, I want to give you a worksheet that you can use to help you with your visioning for 2023. If your future vision is clear enough, it can pull you forward into your New You. Please email me back and I’m happy to send this worksheet to you.

I don’t sell often in these emails, because I just want to add value to you. However, I have found that if there’s no skin in the game, the game doesn’t often get played. I wanted to launch “Your Next Big Move–From Stuck to Soaring” on January 17th, but I got too busy to promote it. I’m going to start that February 5 instead. If you are tired of setting goals that never seem to stick or if you already abandoned your 2025 resolutions, this masterclass is for you.  In four weeks, we will shift your mindset and give you the tools to break through barriers, craft a clear vision, and take actionable steps toward achieving your dreams. Stop wishing and start doing—this is the change you’ve been waiting for.

Click here for more information: https://www.jan-mcdonald.com/your-next-big-move

I am passionate about your freedom and success in life. We all have so much to offer, if only we would step into the abundant life for which we were created. What would it be worth to you to finally triumph over that “thing” that holds you captive? What would it be worth for you to achieve a goal that you really desire?  I know how it feels…and it’s good. I want you to feel that, too. You deserve it.

Jan

Continue Reading...

Families Are Like Fudge

"𝐅𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐟𝐮𝐝𝐠𝐞, 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭, 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐧𝐮𝐭𝐬."

--Anonymous

𝐈 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐝𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐟𝐮𝐥. When you put different people together from different backgrounds, with different expectations–well…sometimes it’s hard to know how to handle it.

My younger brother, Dave Bayer, has a quote that I love, “Our family puts the fun in dysfunctional.” AND that’s true! Here’s how I put the fun in dysfunctional for the holidays.

𝟏. 𝐃𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐬𝐚𝐫𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐨𝐫 𝐛𝐮𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐧-𝐩𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 🔆𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭. It’s the other family member’s deal. It’s their past that they haven’t worked through that is speaking. It can really be kind of painful at times, but 99% of the time this strategy works to keep my emotions on an even keel.

On this note, I don’t push any buttons, 🔆🔆either. Well…my intent is not to push buttons, but sometimes people’s buttons change and they don’t tell me…until those button pushing words are out of my mouth. Then I have to apologize and I do that quickly.

𝟐. 𝐑𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠. 💭We know each family member really well, or so we think we do. I used to think I knew what they were thinking, (see #1 above) but I am not the same person that I was last year. What makes me think that they are?

So I ask lots of open ended questions. I get really curious. I don’t assume anymore (I used to) that I understand everything or everyone, so I ask for clarification, elaboration or whatever I need to grasp the conversation clearly.

𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐚 𝐠𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩𝐬.

𝟑. 𝐖𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡 👀𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞. What we say only accounts for 7% of what is believed by others. The way we say it accounts for 38%. What they see accounts for 56%. Ninety percent of the impression we often convey had nothing to do with what we actually say.

𝟒. 𝐅𝐨𝐜𝐮𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐨𝐧 𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝. Maybe we think there isn’t any, but we’re family for Pete’s sake. We need to close down our cell phones, doodling, fidgeting, whatever else is distracting and concentrate totally on what the other person is saying. Move out of our little world and into theirs. Listen for their feelings, as well. Listen to the words behind the words. THAT can only be done when you are focused🔎🔎 on the other person. We may be surprised at what we do have in common.

𝟓. 𝐒𝐮𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭. My mentor told me that the need to be right can be a splinter to our souls…and to our relationships. I am not going to change anyone’s mind in one day. Value the relationship over the need to be right. (Yeah, this is a tough one:)

Politically, socially and spiritually, my family is as different as the day is long. But like my son always says after a heated political discussion, “𝐈 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐰𝐚𝐲, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭.” 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐡.

Merry Christmas! 🎁🎁🎄🎄

Continue Reading...

Where Should We Send The 5 Simple Steps to Maximize Your Effectiveness Guide?