The leadership Law of Reflection teaches us that learning to pause allows growth to catch up with us. I’m writing about this today because I’m stuck in the airport for the next 5 hours and I’m thinking. This morning in my quiet time, I felt this inner tension to chuck it and move forward quickly into my day. It’s Thanksgiving weekend and the airports are supposedly crowded. Will I get there on time today? What if I miss my flight? The airport is two hours away…will there be road construction? Will my flight home end up like last year…stuck all night in Seattle because of fog in Pasco? 

Some things were out of my control and I started to feel grumpty. Wait…I’ve done this before. And you know that I have been striving to view unknowns as adventure. Had I skipped that time of reflection, I would have run those negative thoughts around my head like a horse in a corral. Skipping the short time-outs that allow me to catch my breath during the day, that makes life even more chaotic. 

Usually that chaos manifests itself in my relationships. I don’t take time to nourish them and be present in them. My mind is moving too fast toward the future to do that. Not good, not good at all. I only had a week with my kids and I didn’t want to end that on a crabby note. 

There is an old joke that experience is a hard teacher because the test is given first and the lesson is given afterward. Ha. Ha. After a huge problem or challenge, it is so easy for me to say, “I am sooooo glad that’s over! Whew!”  I have found that a much better thing to say is, “what can I learn from it?”  If we don’t take the time to evaluate or reflect on the experience, we may never learn the lesson intended for us.

“Experience is not the best teacher…evaluated experience is.”
John Maxwell.

As leaders, most of us are so busy trying to keep up with the demands of our lives, that we don’t take the time to reflect on our lives. We are so action oriented that we neglect to take the time to think. Some times we can miss what John calls “life markers.” These are important events that can really signal a time for transition,change or transformation. We can miss the significance of these experiences for us.

Lack of reflection can also cause us to not learn from a failure or mistake.  If we don’t learn from those, we can repeat them. An evaluated failure or mistake can transform into a valuable learning tool. Our failures and mistakes can actually make us better!

Conversely, reflecting on our successes, blessings and on the things we did right, can make us happy. Reflecting on the good in our lives also makes us grateful. Being grateful causes joy! Without reflecting on the good we’ve done, it’s easy for us to forget about the success and focus on our failures.

Henri J. M. Nouwen observed, “When you are able to create a lonely place in the middle of your actions and concerns, your successes and failures slowly can lose some of their power over you.”

Pausing with intention expands and enriches our thinking. Study the lives of people who have had tremendous impact on the world and you will find that many of them spent a considerable amount of time thinking.

Steve Jobs took time in the morning, no matter what time he woke up to re-evaluate his work and desires. He looked in the mirror and asked, “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” If the answer was “no” for far too long, he would change something.

Benjamin Franklin would eat dinner at 5:00, listen to music, have quiet conversation and then reflect on his day before going to bed at 10:00.

Find a place to think and discipline yourself to pause, even if it’s a small block of time. It has the potential to change your life and can help you figure out what’s really important and what isn’t.

This morning, I made a course correction and took the time to reflect on my feelings. I let go of those things that I couldn’t control. I’m grateful I did. I shared my anticipation (anxieties:) with my daughter, who was my ride to the airport and she said, “Man, Mom, I get that. Let’s go early.”  

Because I took the time to pause and reflect, I was able to pass the test once again. 

Peacefully typed,

Jan

I love fall. It’s one of the most beautiful and mysterious seasons. We can look at the exact same kind of trees all in a row and some of the leaves have turned and some haven’t. How does that happen? The reds and the golds of the leaves that are changing and falling are just spectacular! The trees are letting go of this year’s leaves so they can sleep and refuel for next year’s growth.

Fall is a time of change, a time for nature to let go of the old and begin to prepare for the new.  It’s the time of year where I begin to look at my warddrobe and start to cull the items that I don’t wear or don’t like any more.  

I can’t get rid of that sweater! It belonged to Mom.  (Yes, and she passed away in 2012. I’ve been struggling to let go of this sweater for years.) And the faux fur, black, hooded jacket that I bought when I visited my sister in Cleveland. That jacket is soooo warm, but the wrists on the sleeves are a bit worn. Oh, yeah, the shoes that hurt my toes, and I can only wear them for about an hour…but they were expensive.  I have five purses in my closet which I will probably never use again…but you never know…I had the most awesome blue swede platform clogs that I finally took to Goodwill and now they’re back in style. When you get to be my age, everything comes back in style at one time or another. 

This just makes me laugh. I’m committing to you that I’m cleaning out my closet this week of stuff that no longer serves me.  I get rid of old, limiting mindsets, why is it so difficult with clothes?  Like leaves on my maple, they’ll be on the ground soon to prepare for the new. 

My question to you is, what are you hanging on to that needs to be shed so you can prepare to bring in the new?  What leaves are hanging on your tree that are bursting with the red and gold of letting go, so you can embrace the new?  What old thinking patterns need to change so that new you can spring forth into the next year?

Need help letting go of some old to make room for the new?  I’m just an email away.

Anticipating the new,

Jan

I was privileged to attend the Live2Lead live event virtually this week! It is jam packed with information to help us grow. John spent some time talking about the abundance mentality.  This would be a looooonnnng email if I shared all my notes on his talk, so here’s a standout moment of it.

When we have the abundance mindset, John said that we can believe that life happens for (in favor of) us.  It depends on the Life Stance that we have. A Life Stance is comprised of our daily attitudes, assumptions, expectations and what we believe about ourselves.

Life is filled with good and bad– AND both good and bad will find us. If we view life with a positive Life Stance, the good and the bad will get better. How we view good or bad is our choice and will impact our results. If we have a negative Life Stance, the bad will be worse. 

Managing bad experiences is linked to our Life Stance. Maintaining a positive life stance; being optimistic, cheerful, trusting and brave helps us to thrive through our bad times and turn them into a positive growth. 

I think we may already know the above, but here’s a quote from John for you to ponder, “Procrastination is because we don’t believe something good will come from our actions.” 

Wow! I never looked at procrastination like that, did you? Looking at what we’re procrastinating with a positive Life Stance helps us move forward! I hope this helps you like it did me. 

If you would like to attend Live2Lead Tri-Cities on October 4th, early bird prices end August 31. Click here to register: https://www.jan-mcdonald.com/l2l

Thinking positively, 

Jan

Jan McDonald

Maxwell Leadership Certified Team

I had to turn off the TV after the first five minutes of the debate and my thought was “we could be in trouble.”  

Developing leadership skills was life-changing for me and the organization that I led for 14 years. My relationships improved because my communication skills got better.  I am addicted to professional development because with it, life continues to expand for me. I want that for everyone from the bottom of my mauve painted toenails!

I look at our world today and I realize that the leadership that is being modeled for our next generation leaders is not remotely the same that it was when I was growing up.  

We are living in a world where disagreement reigns and instead of conditions improving for people because of good leadership, many are disappointed and disillusioned because of bad leadership. This is occurring on both sides of the aisle, too. 

We argue over things that we shouldn’t be arguing over and everything seems to cause a fight.  We are not uniting over common ground and the chasm between people seems to widen.

Good  leadership demands that we have character and that we serve others. It is not about gaining power so we can have control over others.  There are not many political leaders in our country who are serving the people, they seem to be there to serve themselves.

Leaders that have character are truth tellers and hope spreaders.  Where have we seen that in today’s leadership and/or in our media…or even in our schools?
Kindness and consideration used to be the minimum standard when we interact with each other, but too many people don’t hold to those same values anymore.

From John’s book, High Road Leadership, “more than 75 percent of Americans believe morals are getting worse. They cite the greatest problem as a lack of consideration for others.” 

What are we modeling for the next generation? There is a leadership law called The Law of the Picture–which shows us that people do what people see. What is the next generation witnessing? This is what makes me sad. 

I want to spread some hope through an invitation for you. I am thrilled to announce to you that my colleague and I are bringing in a leadership conference on October 4, 2024. It is a simulcast of John Maxwell’s Live2Lead. It’s an experience designed to inspire, educate, and equip leaders at all levels. In this 5-hour conference, you will gain new insights and growth tools from thought leaders and peers. You will engage in a meaningful day of learning and connecting with others with a leadership mindset.  

We need each other to make a significant impact in our businesses and communities. I believe that through learning and collaboration, we can begin to model and spread great leadership for those coming behind us. 

Here is a link for more information: https://www.jan-mcdonald.com/l2l

Come and be a part of a conference that brings people together in a world that divides. Thank you for considering this invitation and I look forward to the possibility of working together to make a meaningful difference in our lives and communities. 

If you have any questions or need more information, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me!

Looking forward to hearing from you, 

Jan

When you get this email, I’ll be doing a workshop to give an organization’s team some R and R. Yes, the boss wanted to gift her staff with a workshop that would give them Rest and Relaxation. 

As I wrote this, I realized that I’ll be sharing the tools that I have learned to get through tough times. Living in today’s world can be tough. This is a secular organization so I left the “God” stuff out, but the tools work regardless. 

One of these tools is knowing our why.  Our “why” is the underlying reason or foundation for our behind your actions, decisions, and goals. It’s the deep-rooted motivation that fuels our passion and gives meaning to our lives.

Knowing why we do what we do is like having a treasure map for our lives. It helps us stay on track, even when the path gets tough. When we know our why, we can make better decisions, set goals, and live a more fulfilling life.

When we have a written “why”, we can turn to that in times that are tough. It will inspire us in the hard times.  

Rick Warren quotes, “Humans were made to live with meaning. Without purpose, life is meaningless. A meaningless life is a life without hope or significance…purpose gives meaning. Meaning gives hope and significance.” 

We  have special and unique talents and gifts to impact the world in our way. We were created for a purpose, a “why.” We have to look within to find that “why” and it is usually hooked to your strengths and the things that give you joy.

Here are some questions to help you find your “why:”

1.        Why do you work? Yes, I understand that it pays the bills. What else is the money for? 
2.        Why do you work where you work? What is it about the work that satisfies you.
3.        What gives you joy? What do you day dream about?
4.        What does your soul crave?

What does knowing your why have to do with R and R? 

There are times in my life when I have to go back to “oh yeah, I’m doing this because my purpose is to inspire individuals to bring out their best…and then some.”  I have to remember that not everyone wants to take that trip. Many choose comfort over growth and that’s okay.  Sometimes that’s hard for me.

What’s really hard is to look at our world today and see the craziness. Most of what’s happening is out of my control. And you know how I feel about that:) 

Instead of focusing on today’s world, I go back to how it feels when those I coach or train experience huge wins and growth (my why). When their limiting belief are crushed, my heart warms, the anxiety leaves, my shoulders relax…it’s like I’ve gone to the beach for a moment…and you know how that feels.

Where our focus goes, there our energy flows. I would rather focus on the good that I can do through my “why” than focus on the craziness. 

Try it. Go back to your why when you feel the negativity. Let me know how it works for you. 

If you need help finding your why, reach on out to me. I’d love to chat.